Archive for November 30th, 2011

November 30, 2011

THINGS THAT MAKE YOU GO ‘HOLY CRAP, IS THAT TRUE?? IT IS, ISN’T IT?’: Only One Person Has Ever Admitted to Having Sex with Barry Obama (and it’s a MAN Baby, YEAHHH!)

For all the talk of mistresses, ex-wives, interns, porn stars, and jolly good times, it reminds us of how lucky we are to have a President in Barack Obama who’s never had any lusty babes come forward to admit having had an affair with him. No porn stars in his past. No Chicago strippers. No formerly perky college coeds. No law students who had a brief fling with the Urkel-esque constitutional law lecturer. No seedy females recollecting a one night stand. No hippie chick yoga instructors. No women from adulfriendfinder with a particular fetish for interracial sex. Seriously? No white chicks in Barack Obama’s past? No relationships before M’Obama with now famous TV Journalists who knew Barry back in college. Not one. No one? Not nobody?

Not. A. One. And we’d know if there had been one since the media surely would have reported on it. Because they’re objective and they follow the story wherever it leads. They’d never bury an Obama story.

(Hey ladiieeees, Sidebar:…What do you make of a guy who basically seems to have no sexual history whatsoever? I’m just asking. He’s not a hardcore fundamentalist Christian. He’s not Muslim (allegedly). He’s a freewheeling atheist (for all intents and purposes), but he has no history with women. What would you make of a guy like that ladies? Be honest. What. Is. Up. With a guy like that? This slender, somewhat effeminate Urkel who enjoys giving people the impression that he’s into art and culture.

)

In one of the Bill Ayers autobiographies, Dreams something something, the main character “Barry” — friend of the Chicanos, Marxists, structural feminists and punk-rock performance poets — did in fact have a white girlfriend. I recall this from my  Dreams something something bookclub. But I think she died while trying to detonate a bomb in her NYC apartment, no? As I recall, she lost track of the red and green wires while watching a new episode of Welcome Back Kotter.

What we’re really saying here is it’s just oh-so-curious that in all of human history not one person has ever admitted to having had so much as a Lewinsky with Barry Obama.

Except for one……..

And suddenly…doesn’t Larry Sinclair seem credible? Worthy of a second look? I’m sure Brian Williams, Stephaloplolpolous, and the Po’-Litico will be all over it.

All this talk of dudes with penises hooking up with dudes with penises reminded me of the famous 1992 film “The Crying Game”.  Take a good hard look at the young lady in the movie poster below. Look carefully at the woman’s face. No, look carefully. You look but you do not see. Look at the outline of her face. Look again. Do you see it?

:::The Crying Game/The Sixth Sense/The Usual Suspects moment of twists, epiphany, and revelation:::

What I’m saying is that’s Barack Obama in the picture. Barack Obama IS Jaye Davidson and Jaye Davidson IS Barack Obama.

Barack Obama is actually a transsexual people. Once you begin to slowly accept this — once you’re in that haze of bewilderment, shock, and awe — then and only then should you play the Boy George:

*No problem with Obama being gay or transsexual, by the way.  It’s the Marxist thing that is and always has been the issue.